About me (the real me)...
I was born in Birmingham, England just before the start of the space race, when Laurel & Hardy were still alive, as were all of the Marx brothers, the composers Sibelius and Vaughan-Williams, and John Lennon had only just met Paul McCartney. See if you can figure that out! (Curiously, on the very day I was born, a housewife in Erdington reported a UFO landing in her back garden. This is absolutely true! However, I was born in Selly Oak, about 10 miles away.) I have lived all my life in Northfield, which apparently has over the years been the birthplace of the tallest, the shortest and the ugliest* woman in the world (And I reckon I have been out with all three!)
I am a committed bachelor, and work part-time as a computer know-it-all in the general area of South Birmingham (England) where I have lived all my life (so far). I have been writing poetry since my teens, but have only averaged two or three a year since I only write when I feel I have something to write about, and once I start work on a piece I keep modifying and improving it for weeks or even months before I am happy with it. Some of these poems have been published in
LYRIQ, which is the poetry newsletter of MENSA, of which I have been a member since 1980 or thereabouts. Click here to see a picture of yours truly at about that time... I wish I had that much hair now! (What looks like a rug on my head is actually a shadow, if you look carefully.) More pictures of the whole gang can be found on the Red Herring page.
My influences include the aforementioned Rev. Dodgson, Spike Milligan, Dr. Seuss, (real name Theodore Geisel) and on a more serious note, the science fiction works of Arthur C. Clarke (See Solaria & The Greatest SF Story) , Robert Silverberg, Robert Heinlein, A.E. Van Vogt, also great fantasy writers such as Terry Pratchett, the late Douglas Adams ("Not so much an after-life, more a sort of apres-vie..."), as well as various single works (Catch 22, One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest, etc.) I like anything which stretches my imagination, and I only wish that I could match these literary giants in their offbeat analyses of their own particular universes.
As for my music, I have been experimenting with different forms of music and various methods of producing sounds and recording them since the late 70's, when all I had was a couple of cassette recorders and a guitar! I have created several large scale works of which I am quite proud (and others of which I am not so proud - such is the nature of experimentation) and the best of them can be heard here. I am constantly exploring the boundaries of music and attempting to discover new forms of music and new ways of creating and writing it. Some of my pieces admittedly might sound quite bizarre to anyone reared on "normal" music, but I'm not one to follow the herd, and I am quite proud of some of my more outlandish attempts at "unnatural" composition. Some of my pieces are also very melodic and agreeable, just to prove that I can write tuneful music when I want to!
I am also something of an amateur musicologist, and my record collection spans 1000 years of music, from Hildegard of Bingen (11th century) to Radiohead, from Abba to Zappa, from Stockhausen to the Wombles (Mike Batt never got the credit he deserved!) I have played in several rock bands (none of which, unfortunately, amounted to much – see
Red Herring
and Interface) and consider myself an authority on Classical Symphonic music. I am currently writing a book on the Classical Music (for dummies, perhaps?) Read the first part of it here (pdf file - needs Acrobat Reader)
In addition to the above-mentioned talents, I have also tried my hand at various forms of art, from painting portraits to designing intricate mazes. My philosophy is basically this: Anybody and everybody can be creative, and you don't know what you are capable of until you try - and if you are persistent you will invariably surprise yourself. It doesn't matter if you're not a Mozart or a Van Gogh - what matters is that whatever you create is YOUR unique creation - and you can sit back and say "I made that!" and take some pride in expressing yourself. It doesn't matter what other people think (although it's always nice to have your work praised occasionally, of course!) This is why I set up this website, to show the world what I have done, rather than lock it all away in a drawer - which I did for years, believe me! It's impossible to please everybody of course, but even if just one person writes back and tells me they enjoyed something on this site, then it will have been worth it. (And many have already done just that!)
One other thing - just to clear up any confusion, I'm just a regular guy; I'm not famous, I don't have an Equity card, I don't have a recording contract, I don't own a Porsche and I certainly don't hob-nob with the glitterati - the only thing of value I do have is a fairly up-to-date model of the most complex artefact in the known universe - namely a human brain, and I intend to USE it!
"Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it." - Gandhi
If you would like to send me your opinions, comments or questions you can email me on elwoodherring©blueyonder.co.uk (I always try to reply to all emails unless specifically asked not to) (If you emailed me on my old address herring@blueyonder.co.uk you will not have received a reply as I don't use that address any more (thanks to spam!) Please use the new address above; replacing the © with an @ of course!)
Now if you'll excuse me, I need a lie down, I've got a terrible headache...
* During its history Birmingham has been the home to the smallest woman, the tallest woman and the ugliest woman in the world.
The tallest woman at one time was believed to have been Jane 'Ginny' Bunford from Bartley Green who was 7ft 8ins tall and died in 1922 aged 26. The smallest woman in the nineteenth century was believed to have been Nannette Stocker, a native of Austria who toured sideshows and circuses in the early years of that century. She was just 33 inches tall and is buried at St. Philip's Cathedral, Colmore Row. The ugliest woman was a Mrs Bevan who was exhibited at Pat Collins Funfair at Aston in 1927.
(If you want to see proper pictures of me, click here if you're sure you can stand the shock.)